After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don’t you have any positive news for me? ! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!
Little Johnny walks in on his grandfather smoking a cigar. “May I smoke a cigar?” Asks Johnny.
The grandpa replies “Well, does your dick touch your asshole?”
Johnny replied “No.” and left the room.
The next day Johnny sees his Grandpa getting into a car.
“Can I drive the car?” Asks Johnny.
“Does your dick touch your asshole?”
“No.”
The day after that, Granpa sees Johnny about to eat a cookie.
“Johnny, may I have some of your cookie?” Asked the grandpa.
“Does your dick touch your asshole, grandpa?” “Yep.” “Then go f@ck yourself, this is my cookie.”
“Yep.”
“Then go f@ck yourself, this is my cookie.”
My bf: knock knock me:whos there my bf:ice cream me:ice cream who my bf: ice cream if you don’t let me see that smoking hot body
What did the old chimney say to the young chimney?
Your too young to smoke!
That’s not even a bad joke-
One day a son and his grandad were smoking, too bad only the sun was smoking.:)
— Dark_Humor
What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?
A baked potato.
Two to the one from the one to the three I like good pussy and i like good trees Smoke so much weed you wouldn’t believe And i get more ass than a toilet seat Three to the one from the one to the three I met a bad bitch last night in the d Let me tell you how i made her leave with me Conversation and hennessey I’ve been to the motherf@ckin’ mountain top Heard motherf@ckers talk, seen and dropped If i ain’t got a weapon i’ma pick up a rock And when i bust yo ass i’ma continue to rock Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet It’s real easy just follow the beat Don’t let that fine girl pass you by Look real close "cause strobe lights blind
My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarf’s saw them they sang… “Look at those high Ho’s! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo’sssss!!!”
THIS IS A RYTHME
Jack and jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana
Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said u know u wanna
Jill said yes as he grabbed her dress And they had a little fun Jill forgot her pills so now they have a son
And they had a little fun
Jill forgot her pills so now they have a son
One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, “Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No”, said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, “Then you’re not old enough.” The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, “Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?” His grandpa replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” “No” said Little Johhny. “Then you’re not old enough.” his grandpa replied. The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, “Can I have some of your cookies?” Little Johnny replied, “Can your penis reach your asshole?” His grandpa replied, “It most certainly can!” Little Johnny replied, "Then go f@ck yourself
A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked “Dad, what are you wearing?”. The father would answer with “A costume for Halloween.”. the child asked “can i join?”. He said no, for he said it’s their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana Jack got high touch just thigh and said I know you wanna But silly Jill forgot her pill and now they have a kid
Why did the guy get the hose
Because the girl was smoking hot
Cool, new word of the day: Marijuana. “Does Marry wanna smoke a joint?”
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly I took one shot puffed through my pipe and jumped in the air on a trampoline I woke up in heaven. I asked an angel how did I die you? "Well little monkey you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head your mom called the doctor and doctor said you were dead.
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